Jeep/Hakkai ficlet of wrongness

[louiselux]

Dear lord my hangover is appalling and is possibly to blame for this. emungere is evil brought the idea up. So, what if Ni was a slasher? It's canon that he writes erotica, anyway, right? As I said before, I make my own fun.



Houtou castle was deserted when they finally got there.

'Look, here are Ni's papers,' Hakkai said. 'There might be important information.' He flipped open the leather folder marked Sanzo-Ikkou.

'"Dragon Love, by Ni Jianyi"' read Hakkai, aloud. '"Jeep's door gaped open invitingly and the tall, green-eyed youkai slid his lithe form into the firm, taut leather of Jeep's driving seat. "Are you ready to go?" Cho Hakkai said, stroking Jeep's trembling gear stick. He wasn't prepared to take no for an answer, and so with a cruel flick of his powerful fingers he fired up Jeep's engine and thrust down the accelerator pedal to the floor, making Jeep squeal. Vibrations from his throbbing engine shuddered through them both. "Let's ride," Hakkai hissed."'

Hakkai stopped. 'Oh.'

The others stood silent. Gojyo was biting his lips together, his eyes fixed on the floor. Sanzo had hidden his face behind his fan and his shoulders were shaking.

'This man clearly needs to die,' Hakkai said in firm tones.

They nodded solemnly.

'Good story. So, what happens next?' said Goku.

Jeep bit him.

Comments

[fleurrochard]

*dies giggling*

[blu-mondae.livejournal.com]

This had me laughing out loud.

I can totally see Ni as an RPS-er.

[nekonexus.livejournal.com]

... so wrong... so funny! *snorfle* ^_^;;

[nightfallrising.livejournal.com]

...I'm with Sanzo. XD

[kintail.livejournal.com]

*bwahaha* Ahem.

Ouch, poor Hakkai. That'll teach him about reading something out loud before skimming it over first.

Have you read karotsamused's take on Jeep/Hakkai (http://www.livejournal.com/users/karotsamused/22989.html)?

*~_^*;;

>.< reposted due to inability to manage html on first try before coffee.

[faemovana.livejournal.com]

BWHAHAHAHA!

I second Goku! What happens next? :P

[yukie1013.livejournal.com]

*cackleDOOOM*

And Nii WOULD.

[weyrlady.livejournal.com]

*dies laughing* Utterly brilliant!

[scribblemoose]

*falls over laughing*

Superb. ^___^ You should get hungover more often if this is what happens. Although, hope you feel better soon. :)

[wildelamassu.livejournal.com]

*cackles*

[aqua-eyes.livejournal.com]

:pmsl:

[cicer.livejournal.com]

*shrieks with laughter*

[emungere.livejournal.com]

*still giggling* Dragon Love! Heeee.

'This man clearly needs to die.' Hakkai said in firm tones.

Poor Hakkai. Though I bet Sanzo won't be laughing after they find the stuff about him. *snerk*

[baka-gaijin.livejournal.com]

~ cough ~

My Contribution (http://www.livejournal.com/users/baka_gaijin/48949.html#cutid1) to the jeep sex thing.

~ cough ~

[tj-dragonblade.livejournal.com]

(headdesks)

(follows Sanzo's lead)

(agrees with Hakkai)

Nii, I love you.

This is priceless in its wrong-ness. Though I think that truly, the last line is the best.

[baka-gaijin.livejournal.com]

~ shivers ~

Oh, I took your little fic very seriously. And you are actually to blame for me being lured over to the dark side of dragon sex.... whether it's Hakuryu or Goujun.

And I thank you for it. XD

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Hakkai didn't take the laughter well.

'Oh, look! There's more. Listen to this, Sanzo. It's quite fascinating: "From Here to Eternity by Ni Jianyi, a Bodice Robe Ripper in 105 parts. Part One: When Sanzos Go Bad."'

'The pervert! I'll kill him. Don’t you dare - '

'"Genjyo Sanzo stroked his hands over his skin tight leather shirt in an unmistakeable gesture of arousal. His silky blond hair fell seductively over his smooth, porcelain-pure skin as he dropped to his knees in front of the tall half-youkai. 'Come on and show me what you can do, big boy,' he whispered... "'

Hakkai only just managed to dodge the thunderous hail of bullets.

'Can I have a copy of that?' whispered Gojyo, afterwards.

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Hee! So. Much. Love.

And then Hakkai could hand him the Shacest... *g*

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Because Hakkai could take that in his stride, being familiar with the concept... XD

It's Goku and Nyoi-bo I'm worried about.

I did not just think that.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Hee! Ni says thanks.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Yay! You will give in to the Dark Side. XD

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Hee!

Thanks.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha!

Does that translate as 'pissing myself laughing?' or something like that? *is ignorant*

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Hehehe!

Thanks.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Ni likes to relax of an evening with a steamy bodice robe ripper. That's he's written.

XD