Snippet for Notassuch

[louiselux]

For notassuch, Aziraphale and Crowley make a small wager.




Human Like You


'I could be completely human for as long as I wanted and feel absolutely no side effects.'

Aziraphale laughed out loud. 'Have you ever tried to live without relying on your powers? As a human? I don't think you'd manage very well, my dear.'

'And you would?' Crowley tapped the bottle they were sharing. 'Are you telling me that this £3.99 bottle of Sainsbury's Shiraz is still a bottle of £3.99 Sainsbury's Shiraz? You couldn't go a week without doing something. '

Aziraphale pursed his lips. 'Well, that's different.'

Crowley shook his head, grinning. 'Fifty pounds says you can't.'

Fifty pounds was tempting. 'You're on.'

'You switch off first,' Crowley said, tapping his foot.

'Together,' Aziraphale said.

Crowley sighed. 'All right. Okay? Ready?'

Aziraphale nodded and closed his eyes very briefly, taking a deep breath.

'Go!'

Aziraphale opened his eyes. Everything was a little more blurry than it was before. He had a headache.

'Humans are so itchy,' Crowley said, scratching his wrist. He took his sunglasses off to reveal plain brown eyes. 'It's dark in here too. You should get a new bulb. This isn't asbad as I thought,' he said, stretching. Then, sniffing, 'what's that smell?'

'Just the dry rot.'

Crowley gave him a cool look: 'Think I might go and get some fresh air. Indulge in a bit of exercise, or some other human pleasures.' He winked at Aziraphale.

He stalked to the door, stubbing his toe on a box of bargain books, then quietly cursing. Aziraphale looked after him, smiling. There were some cashmere socks in Selfridges that he'd been coveting - two pairs would come to just under fifty pounds.

'Come round for lunch tomorrow?' he called after Crowley's retreating back. He didn't want Crowley cheating and taking a day off. He'd make a large dish of extra-strength chilli for lunch, and then they could watch Crown Green Bowling all afternoon. That should finish Crowley off in no time.

The door slammed shut with a muttered agreement and Aziraphale watched with pleasure as Crowley fiddled with the Bentley's door, dropped his keys, ripped the parking ticket off the windscreen and did an 87 point turn to get out of the tiny parking space. The Bentley drove slowly off down the road. Aziraphale rubbed his aching back and got up to fetch the biscuits.

The socks were as good as his.

Comments

[daegaer.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha!

'Humans are so itchy,' Crowley said, scratching his wrist.

He is so right. The moment I read this the sympathy itches started.

And I love Aziraphale's method of stopping Crowley cheating. Poor fellow, faced with chilli and bowls :-)

Aziraphale watched with pleasure as Crowley fiddled with the Bentley's door, dropped his keys, ripped the parking ticket off the windscreen and did a 87 point turn to get out of the tiny parking space.

He's not even going to last the drive back to Mayfair! Poor, innocent little demon, caught up in angelic machinations. (For socks? For shame, Aziraphale!)

[odditycollector.livejournal.com]

Squee! Thank you! It's perfect

Crowley fiddled with the Bentley's door, dropped his keys, ripped the parking ticket off the windscreen and did a 87 point turn to get out of the tiny parking space. The Bentley drove slowly off down the road.

*giggles* How slowly, I wonder. I have this image of a paranoid Crowley, rolling along at about 20 km/h and cursing at the idiots who keep passing him and swerving into his five car buffer-zone between him and the car ahead...

[odditycollector.livejournal.com]

Poor, innocent little demon, caught up in angelic machinations.
I was already giggling, but that just about finshed me off.

[shati.livejournal.com]

The socks were as good as his.

Here I stopped, stared for a few moments in confusion ("socks? whuh?"), then suddenly recovered my brain, remembered earlier bits, and started sniggering. I'm a bit slow, but very amused.

And I have to agree. Aziraphale would so win.

[katmaxwell.livejournal.com]

Oh, that's absolutely priceless -- the whole idea of simply having to "switch off" sent me reeling.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the fb! I know, socks. It doesn't take much. I think Crowley might last until half way through the bowls, when his digestive system starts to process Aziraphale's super-heated lunch.

That's interesting that you had sympathy itches. I wonder if everybody did..

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Yay, you like it:-) That makes me happy.

I have this image of a paranoid Crowley, rolling along at about 20 km/h and cursing at the idiots who keep passing him and swerving into his five car buffer-zone between him and the car ahead...

You just collapsed me into giggles with that image!

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Hee! Thanks.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much!

[yonmei.livejournal.com]

Socks? Aziraphale is so evil!

[biascut.livejournal.com]

Check! But I constantly itch anyway - I never manage to forget for more than half an hour!

[biascut.livejournal.com]

Mmm, cashmere socks. Sounds worth it to me!

Lovely!

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Absolutely. I'd do anything for cashmere socks. Well, almost anything. I'm glad you liked it!

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

He's badder than bad, especially when tempted by luxury footgear.

[liar-xx.livejournal.com]

He's badder than bad, especially when tempted by luxury footgear.

Haha! Loved it, as I have loved all of your GO stuff, come to think of it.

[enigel]

come on, you know you want to write the follow-up :>
::tempts::

Crowley won't go down without a fight, and he surely has some tricks up his sleeve... more's the fun to see Aziraphale graciously dodge them. (because he has to win. socks are a very noble human angelic aspiration.)

PS 25 pounds socks?! ::converts:: ::falls over::

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

I'm very pleased you enjoyed it! Thanks for your lovely comments.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Ah, well, if that is an official snippet request from you then I have no choice but to answer it:-)

I have only ever fondled cashmere socks in the shops, I've never been able to afford them. I suppose Aziraphale is a bit of a Mary Sue here, sock-wise.

[enigel]

it is! it is!

though I feel a little strange requesting when I'm not really able to give fic in return... but you can ask me for an icon (or more)

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Oooh, an icon! If you wanted to do that I'd be very happy. Something Good Omensy would be wonderful - or at least something to do with angels. Thank you!

[enigel]

I then have to ask, what is your image of Aziraphale? I have a few ideas, some of which might profit from this knowledge ;-)

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Hmm, okay. Aziraphale is sort of plump, mid forties, dark blond/light brown hair in a rather conservative style, grey/blue eyes. Nice features, neatly dressed, with sober suit and tie, and a manicure. Clothes fairly expensive. Tall - ever since daegaer said about angels traditionally being 6 foot tall, I always imagine him like that. I don't picture him with any headgear.

Is that enough?

[enigel]

as for GO stuff:
I scoured gettyimages, google and a couple of other places, but not much clicked.
did you see the icons I posted in lower_tadfield a while ago? I used all the angelic inspiration I could muster :D
as for angels, I liked this nice fellow:

but I couldn't think of anything else to put on it. if you don't want to use it it's ok, and I can always re-use the base image so it's no trouble at all.
if you have other ideas feel free to chuck them at me, I'm always receptive :D

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Oh, it's lovely! Thank you so much! I'll defintely use it. I think I have space in my 3 icon allowance:-)

I also liked the Aziraphale one you did in Lower Tadfield - very witty and clever.

[enigel]

squee! you like!

and thanks!
oh, how I love gettyimages :D

[lovelyzelda.livejournal.com]

Love it! Especially since my Tesco's £2.74 Cab Sav is Tesco's £2.74 Cab Sav now and forever(£3.99 Shiraz is only for special occasions)

Crowley definitely won't make it back to Mayfair without cheating--he hasn't bothered to get petrol since the 60's. :)

[shinzuku.livejournal.com]

Awesome.