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A Good Omens snippet for [livejournal.com profile] cimorene111


It was an exciting morning for the Goring-on-Thames Jehovah's Witnesses coffee morning. No one had anything more profound on their minds than a decent cup of tea and a sit down, so Ethel Pratt was extremely surprised to find herself in the grip of religious ecstasy as she bit into a slice of Mrs Parkinson's home made shortbread. The small part of her mind not suffused with agonising joy and awe worried doggedly about who was going to get the washing in if it rained. She foamed gently at the mouth and fell over.

Crowley ticked 'E Pratt: 1 gentle glow of spiritual peace' off the list.

*


Gerald Staines was only supposed to experience a mild spiritual enlightenment after a nice afternoon in the park. Instead he ran shrieking and naked into his own back garden, weeping with holy fervour. It was when he began to flagellate himself with the hosepipe that his neighbours rang the police.

Parked in the street outside, Crowley grinned. At least he looked happy.

*


' ...anyway, when are you coming back?' Crowley said into the tiny mobile phone he'd designed, which gave humans finger cramps. Not that he missed Aziraphale or anything like that. It was just a pain to be doing all his work, the lazy angel.

'I'll be back tomorrow. These work dos tend to drag on, you know. We haven't even got round to dinner yet, and the table was booked for two days ago.'

'You've just been in the pub for two solid days while I've been doing all the work!'

'Now, Crowley, that's not strictly true. Some of us popped out for a curry yesterday,' Aziraphale said, to a sudden background of hideous shrieking. 

'What's going on up there?'

'Oh. That's Michael re-enacting the Fall. Again.'

'He always was a tactless sod.'

'Yes. Quite. So, how's it been?' came Aziraphale's tinny voice on the end of the phone.

'Fine. I gave the last one ten minutes full beam, just like you said.'

'Oh, Crowley!' Aziraphale's voice rose in pitch. 'You're only supposed to do that for the real fanatics. And some television celebrities.' There was a sigh. 'So, what happened?'

Crowley told him.

'Well, leave it for now,' Aziraphale said, 'but if they don't let him out of that hospital in six weeks, you're the one who's fixing it. I thought I could trust you to do these things for me.'

'Look, I'm doing you a favour, you bastard,' he said, to a silence that managed to be icy even down miles of pulsing, demonically heated phone cable.

'One might almost think you're messing up my work on purpose, Crowley,' Aziraphale said, suddenly sounding horribly smug. 'Do you miss me that much?'

'What? You must still be drunk,' Crowley muttered. 'I do not miss you. At all.'

'Whatever you say, dear boy.'

Date: 2005-04-15 02:15 pm (UTC)
ext_1310: (Default)
From: [identity profile] musesfool.livejournal.com
Hee!

I love smug!Aziraphale and in denial!Crowley.

Date: 2005-04-17 02:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Poor Crowley-- so angel-whipped.

Thanks!

Date: 2005-04-15 02:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] toscas-kiss.livejournal.com
That is just so wonderfully deviously Crowley! And yes, denial! denial! denial! :-D

'Oh. That's Michael re-enacting the Fall. Again.'
'He always was a tactless sod.'


Angel partytricks! [giggles frantically]

Date: 2005-04-18 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Thank you!

Date: 2005-04-15 02:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yonmei.livejournal.com
Ethel Pratt was extremely surprised to find herself in the grip of religious ecstasy as she bit into a slice of Mrs Parkinson's home made shortbread.

So would I be, I'm sure...

'One might almost think you're messing up my work on purpose, Crowley,' Aziraphale said, suddenly sounding horribly smug. 'Do you miss me that much?'

'What? You must still be drunk,' Crowley muttered. 'I do not miss you. At all.'

'Whatever you say, dear boy.'


Awww!

Date: 2005-04-18 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Poor Crowley - we don't believe you, and neither does Aziraphale:-)

Date: 2005-04-15 03:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] corporal-katz.livejournal.com
*giggles* That was awesome. :)

Date: 2005-04-18 02:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Thank you!

Date: 2005-04-15 03:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] daegaer.livejournal.com
Yay! Crowley, you bad, bad, bad, sillly boy. This is great :-)

It was when he began to flagellate himself with hosepipe that his neighbours rang the police.

Parked in the street outside, Crowley grinned. At least he looked happy.


Hee hee!

Date: 2005-04-18 02:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Thanks! Crowley is so easily entertained.

Date: 2005-04-15 04:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cimness.livejournal.com
ahahahahah, yay.

i could watch crowley do aziraphale's job for hours.

Date: 2005-04-18 02:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Hehehe. He's a very thorough sort of demon.

Date: 2005-04-15 08:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cicer.livejournal.com
Too cute! *giggles over Crowley's attempts at doing Aziraphale's job* And Aziraphale at an angel convention! *dies* This is too darling.

Date: 2005-04-18 02:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Thank you! Crowley just can't hold back, nor does he see the point, really.

Thank you!

Date: 2005-04-15 10:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] burntcopper.livejournal.com
'1 gentle glow of spiritual peace'

:snerk: perfect. just fabulous.

Date: 2005-04-18 02:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Heehee!

Thanks.

Date: 2005-04-15 11:31 pm (UTC)
enigel: Aziraphale shielding Crawly under his wing (Aziraphale fairly happy (me))
From: [personal profile] enigel
'You've just been in the pub for two solid days while I've been doing all the work!'

'Oh. That's Michael re-enacting the Fall. Again.'
'He always was a tactless sod.'


*laughs, and laughs, and laughs*

Not that he missed Aziraphale or anything like that.

Yes, Crowley, we believe you... About as much as Aziraphale believes you, anyway :>

Date: 2005-04-18 02:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Poor Crowley;-)

Thanks!

Date: 2005-04-16 03:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mistressrenet.livejournal.com
OTP, baby. OTP. ::warm fuzzy glow::

Date: 2005-04-18 01:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
They are, there's no doubt about it. XD

Date: 2005-04-16 03:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] onefrabjousday.livejournal.com
-snickersnort- I LOVE the idea of the angels in a pub doing off-...er, off-soul jokes about the Fall and the Garden of Eden or something. And the idea, "ten minutes full beam," had me snickering. Hahah foam. Mmm. spiritual foam.

Date: 2005-04-18 01:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Hee! Off-soul jokes.

Cheers!

Date: 2005-04-16 04:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] digitalnight.livejournal.com
Awww. *giggles* I love the idea of an Angel Convention. I've just disturbed my housemates with my laughing.

Date: 2005-04-18 01:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Angel conventions involve industrial strength alcohol and ocking of the afflicted. Glad you liked this:-)

Date: 2005-04-18 01:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
...mocking, I meant! Not ocking.

Date: 2005-04-16 05:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wildmachinery.livejournal.com
Oh, absolutely brilliant.

'Oh. That's Michael re-enacting the Fall. Again.'

'He always was a tactless sod.'

'Yes. Quite. So, how's it been?'


*hearts*

Date: 2005-04-18 01:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Crowley and Michael never really got on, I think. XD

Thanks.

Date: 2005-04-16 05:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] evilsimon.livejournal.com
Glorious. Utterly so.

Date: 2005-04-18 01:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Thank you!

Date: 2005-04-16 06:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runcible.livejournal.com
::KEELS OVER FROM LAUGHTER::

You are brilliant. :D

'Now, Crowley, that's not strictly true. Some of us popped out for a curry yesterday,' Aziraphale said, to a sudden background of hideous shrieking.

'What's going on up there?'

'Oh. That's Michael re-enacting the Fall. Again.'


::tears::

Date: 2005-04-18 01:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Yay! Glad you enjoyed it and the reliving of Michael's finest hour.

Date: 2005-04-16 06:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayet.livejournal.com
'What's going on up there?'

'Oh. That's Michael re-enacting the Fall. Again.'


L.O.L. So that's what angels do at parties.

I loved this. Loved loved loved. Do more. :D

Date: 2005-04-18 01:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Thanks:-)

Date: 2005-04-16 11:57 pm (UTC)
ext_13979: (Serpent)
From: [identity profile] ajodasso.livejournal.com
Not that he missed Aziraphale or anything like that. It was just a pain to be doing all his work, the lazy angel.

*pats Crowley on the head*

For a demon, you're not very convincing.

Date: 2005-04-18 01:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
I think he can only just manage to convince himself most of the time.

Date: 2005-04-18 01:54 pm (UTC)
ext_13979: (Seraphim)
From: [identity profile] ajodasso.livejournal.com
Isn't that the truth. Poor thing. I'm sure Aziraphale is valiantly not-missing him, too *rolls eyes* *grins*

Date: 2005-04-17 01:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] penm.livejournal.com
'What's going on up there?'

'Oh. That's Michael re-enacting the Fall. Again.'


Possibly my favourite line EVER.

Actually, that makes me think. [livejournal.com profile] irisbleu gave me an idea about Heaven's office parties and the song 'Michael' coming on and the younger angels making snide remakrs and then Michael the archangel getting very snippy and smite-happy after that.

But anyway. N'awwww, Crowley's in denial!

Date: 2005-04-18 01:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Hee! Those naughty partying angels. Thanks!

Date: 2005-04-19 12:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] unravels.livejournal.com
OH man... I laughed and laughed and laughed over this story - and I really needed a laugh, so thanks. :) I especially loved Crowley vs. Gerald Staines. And Michael! And the ending! *happy sigh*

Date: 2005-04-19 11:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] louiselux.livejournal.com
Yay! Thanks:D

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