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Jumble o' thoughts
Jul. 10th, 2002 07:11 pmAmazingly, we managed to get into the cinema this weekend, on the first weekend of Tom Cruise's new vehicle, Minority Report. I can't think of anything else to say, but that it was a good film. Lets leave it at that.
Blankness of brain seems to be the theme of the last few weeks, can't think of much to say about anything. Oh, here comes a thought. Stephen King's new book, Dreamcatcher. The bugger's shoved a ton of slashy vibes in there. Interesting, not the sort of thing I'd expect from him at all.
Look at all the things I have to do: make curtains (cheap option), reply to many letters demanding various things, and send some thank you postcards to folk who've been kind enough to send me things. Make dinner, tidy up, do laundry, redo website, apply for jobs (what I should be doing right now), keep up with my friends, write, think hard about my future (I can't help doing this). I have 'sand through the fingers' syndrome'. Rationally I tell myself that lfe is more that 50% chance, and all my decisions are tied to the decisions of everyone else, and I can't hope to be in control of everything. But that won't wash with me. I'm a hard line fretter, if I can somehow give myself a pile of worry, then I will.
I know what's making me feel like this too, like I have achieved nothing: it's the fear that I've wasted 4 years of education doing the wrong thing. But I know that's wrong, no education is ever wasted, even if it hasn't lead to the sort of work I wanted.
Blankness of brain seems to be the theme of the last few weeks, can't think of much to say about anything. Oh, here comes a thought. Stephen King's new book, Dreamcatcher. The bugger's shoved a ton of slashy vibes in there. Interesting, not the sort of thing I'd expect from him at all.
Look at all the things I have to do: make curtains (cheap option), reply to many letters demanding various things, and send some thank you postcards to folk who've been kind enough to send me things. Make dinner, tidy up, do laundry, redo website, apply for jobs (what I should be doing right now), keep up with my friends, write, think hard about my future (I can't help doing this). I have 'sand through the fingers' syndrome'. Rationally I tell myself that lfe is more that 50% chance, and all my decisions are tied to the decisions of everyone else, and I can't hope to be in control of everything. But that won't wash with me. I'm a hard line fretter, if I can somehow give myself a pile of worry, then I will.
I know what's making me feel like this too, like I have achieved nothing: it's the fear that I've wasted 4 years of education doing the wrong thing. But I know that's wrong, no education is ever wasted, even if it hasn't lead to the sort of work I wanted.
